An American in Jordan

You might have seen this one, as it has made it’s way across the internet and probably landed in your inbox like it did in mine.  Nevertheless, it gave me a little chuckle despite the stupid premise, so I’ll share it here.

For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health.  It’s a relief to know the truth after all thos conflicting nutritional studies.

• The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
• The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
• The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
• The French drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
• The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:

Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Here’s a funny little video about the state of Presidential campaign affairs in the States by the talented people over at Jib Jab. Be sure to keep an eye out for a special guest star near the end of the video.

• Let’s check for head lice!
• Who weighs the most?
• Hokey Pokey Colonoscopy
• 20,000 questions.
• catch the birthday cake
• drinking sudoku
• guess whose chest hair you’re feeling
• pin the tail on the real live pitbull
• two minutes in the closet, alone
• spin the toddler

Source: Shoebox blog

Shoebox blog has a funny little piece on ‘What Would Be Different If Gnomes Take Over The World’.

• everyone will be more beardy
• “Must be less than this tall to ride.”
• no pointy hats, no curly shoes, no service.
• state names legally changed to Gnebraska, Gnorth Dakota and and Gnevada.
• that “Short People” song will get even less air time
• airlines can offer first class legroom without changing a thing
• Smurficide. Lots and lots of Smurficide.

Here are a few more of my favorite Newsdroppings from Shoebox:

• The Olympic torch arrived in San Francisco and was warmly accepted by a crowd of huge flames.
• Diet experts suggest small changes in eating habits to lose weight, such as substituting french fries for fruit salad with your burger, plus no burger.
• A new study reveals that smart women are more likely to marry. Mainly because dumb women keep going to Barbra Streisand concerts to meet guys.
• Looks like Jay-Z and Beyonce have gotten married after six years together. So there goes that relationship.
• Angelina Jolie took her boys to a museum. Someone got a Journalism degree at a good school, probably still paying off the loan, to tell us this.