The Pinkie Nail: A Treatise
Would someone please explain to me the thought process behind growing out the pinkie finger nail? Every time I see some guy sporting four normal looking finger nails and one ultra-long pinkie finger nail, it wierds me out.
I think I understand the basic jist: the mentality is that having a perfectly manicured, elongated pinkie finger nail is an outward sign that one is not a member of the blue collar working class (or “party of the propertyless proletariat” according to George Bernard Shaw). After all, one cannot maintain such a well-groomed nail while performing manual labor.
The problem I have with this is several fold. First of all, having an elongated pinkie finger nail does not necessarily mean that you have a prestigious job. After all, being a taxi driver does not classify one as “white collar”.
Second, it reminds me of the evil genius, Casanova Frankenstein, from the movie Mystery Men. (If you’ve never seen Mystery Men, you really haven’t lived.) One of his “super powers” is an extremely long, sharp and potentially deadly pinkie nail which he uses to slash at his enemies. It also reminds me of Dr. Evil, looking coy with his pinkie finger up to his mouth.
Third, I have to wonder, how does one care for such an outlandish appendage adornment? Does it get filed and polished on a regular basis? Does one walk into a nail salon (not saloon, by the way; that’s where cowboys in the Wild West drink whiskey) and ask for a single-nail manicure? If it breaks, is there a lot of whining followed by the words, “Ah, I broke a nail!”?
And last, it just looks sick. Truly. Guys were not designed to have long fingernails, especially one orphaned outcast that juts out beyond the others. Do us all a favor and trim that thing down.
Tololy May 15th, 2006 9:35 am
I could not have put it better myself. I always wonder why some people just insist on being disgusting. I do not know why they do that, I ask and ask but there are no answers.
salam May 15th, 2006 11:01 am
well,I need to agree with you on this one,though I read your comment on Roba’s blog and thought it was too ofeensive for all of us Jordanians,i hope I misunderstood your intention.I have no clue why men do that!I remember a teacher we had in school who always had a disgustingly long nail and a girl asked him why,he said when you get married you’ll know!what the hell did he mean?no clue!
Dave May 15th, 2006 11:07 am
Salam, which comment on Roba’s blog? If you are refering to my most recent comment, I assure you no offense is intended (unless you are part of the Jordanian police force).
salam May 16th, 2006 11:56 am
LOL.no I’m not part of the police force but you said Jordan’s finest(police officers),so I thought the intention was that all Jordanians were targeted if their finest:the police officers are like that ,so the rest are even worse.I’m glad that wasn’t your intention.
Dave May 16th, 2006 12:02 pm
Sorry for the confusion. In the States, we use the phrase “[insert city here]’s Finest” as slang to indicate the police (for example, New York’s Finest). It is sometimes used as a term of endearment, but othertimes is used sarcastically, as in this case.
salam May 16th, 2006 12:11 pm
I see,culture gap,I guess..glad that is the case..thanks for explaining!
Firas May 16th, 2006 11:46 pm
Well Dave, it’s disgusting! And it’s usually used for ungodly things.
Actually it gives a lot about the guy you are talking to (self hygiene, hence background and culture).
Dave May 22nd, 2006 11:23 am
It’s an easy cocaine spoon for a lot of folks.
The Coke Finger « 7aki Fadi March 27th, 2008 12:25 am
[...] continued my search to find out that the one and only Dave has already tackled this issue on his blog, he was so weirded out by it that he wrote a Treatise [...]